To the Romantics (and Heroes)

Eternity in our hearts

Saint George and the Dragon, Raphael

Dearest Readers,

Given the title of this post, up-front I must confess I am not what one would call a person of romance—at least not the February fourteenth variety. My husband and I, with similar sentiments and mutual relief, come up quite short in this area. Actually, we had only been dating about a month when our first Valentine’s Day surfaced. My husband-to-be bought me roses, which, admittedly, was sweet. But it was the card that won me over. He wrote something to the effect of, “I’m not sure about obligatory gestures of affection, but Happy Valentine’s Day nonetheless.”

I took this as a good sign for our future together.

Even given our romantic reluctance, we tried valiantly in the early years, until we finally realized that a) we simply weren’t Valentine’s people and b) it had nothing to do with the quality of our marriage.

Still, for some reason, when our children came along it seemed important to take part in the holiday for their sake. So, when our boys were young, I dutifully bought them little stuffed animals and subpar chocolates encased in heart-shaped boxes and pink cellophane. I’m sure they liked the candy, but one year, after receiving these perfunctory offerings, our oldest child looked at me with a furrowed brow and said, “I don’t get this holiday.” Ah, the apple falls not far...

Thankfully, not all of our children are so cynical. We need balance.

Still, compulsory expressions of affection and mediocre chocolate aside, I am a romantic. At least when we embrace the broader meaning. Merriam-Webster defines romantic (among other definitions) as: “marked by the imaginative or emotional appeal of what is heroic, adventurous, mysterious, or idealized.”

This is the kind of romance I can get behind. And actually, within the realm of this definition, I would argue that we are all romantics. There is something embedded in the heart of man that draws him to the heroic and the ideal, whether that be good triumphing over evil or true love conquering all odds. Tropes exist, after all, because we are drawn to their themes time and again. We long for such stories and take comfort in them. As followers of Christ and believers in the great Story, we ultimately perceive themes of the eternal therewithin.

In the biblical narrative, both true and accurate, the world and man are created and called good. Satan and sin, our great foes, come along and mar perfection. God sends a hero (himself) to defeat evil, redeem the world, and win back his Bride. This story’s resonant themes are present in many, if not most, romance and fantasy novels. What’s more, they are woven into the very fabric of our imaginations. I believe this is what Solomon means in Ecclesiastes 3:11 when, he states, “Also, he [God] has put eternity into man’s heart…”

There is a reason romance and fantasy are bestselling genres in the book and media realm. The heart of man craves their messages. We need to constantly be reminded that love and goodness will conquer and save the day.

My daughter gave evidence to this recently. She was watching The Lion, the Witch, and The Wardrobe for the umpteenth time, and I happened to come into the room just as the great battle against the White Witch was about to commence. She turned to me, bright-eyed and bouncing on the couch, and exclaimed, “I LOVE THE BATTLE SCENE!” I smiled. Indeed, my little warrior.

So, why the post?

I suppose given the month, I wanted to give a defense for my friends who read, write, or love romances. Just as I’m not drawn to this month’s celebration, romance is not my go-to genre, at least not in book form. This, despite the fact that a significant romantic thread runs through my current work-in-progress (in fact my critique group is made up of romance writers because I need their help!). But romance is important. Necessary even. While many books in the genre might actually be deemed fantasy (tongue-in-cheek, here), I believe the heart pull to their idealism is the same impulse to eternity. The same holds true for stories that incorporate the hero’s journey. Again, we need reminders.

If though, like me, you find yourself inclined to cynicism—welcome, kindred spirit—one prone to disdain your idealistic compadres’ affections, perhaps it’s time to reframe your perspective. God has placed eternity in each of our hearts, and we satisfy those inclinations uniquely and in myriad ways. Romance and fantasy, yes, but also family, nature, work, to name a few. Wherever we find resonance, hopefully, those inclinations ultimately lead us to the true lover and victor of our souls. Let us not judge how God woos our brethren.

In conclusion, and in the continued spirit of romance, I would love to recommend a book in the genre. Last year, I read a handful of titles with romance as the primary theme. I can’t say I disliked any of them, but Drinker of Ink by Shannon Castleton was the standout for me. This contemporary love story, written in epistolary form, is simply gorgeous. It’s literary, poetic, complex, and moving. I couldn’t put it down and found the same to be true for others. If you like romances, I highly recommend it.

I almost swooned over this one.

Finally, whether you are a Valentine’s-type human or not, I hope you will embrace your romantic and heroic impulses.

You were made for it.

Tiffany